I’d like to share a story with you. I warn you it is tragic and has no happy ending. But it is important. Sadly, I’ve seen this story play out again and again, though with different details. And admittedly, this is a compilation of multiple stories with some dramatic license taken on my part. Names have been changed to protect the innocent (and keep from shaming the guilty). You probably know these people or some like them.
God's Way for Our Family
Macklemore begins his song “Same Love” with this line: “When I was in third grade I thought that I was gay, ‘cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight.” Later in the song he offers his description of our culture saying, “A world so hateful some would rather die than be who they are.” This line hits on the fundamental problem of our day. And while many in our world are hateful, that is not the real problem highlighted by this lyric.
“I can’t believe it you @#$&%$. I had right of way you *&%$@#*&. Where did you learn how to drive you stupid &%$#+$@?” And all this from the mouth of a Christian gesturing with his hand, as John Maxwell says, that the other driver is number 1. When called on the carpet for such a blatant violation of James 3:6-12, the brother or sister responds, “I can’t help myself. When someone pulls out in front of me, it just flies all over me. I have to do something.” That seems natural. It seems almost logical. We may even want to make an exception to God’s will about the tongue in this situation. But do we really have to do this kind of something? Or can we actually overcome road rage and other irrational expressions of emotion?
Yes, we can overcome. Keep reading to find out how.
It happened again. You didn’t mean to say anything. You knew it would blow everything up. But someone had to do something. Someone had to man up and put so and so in his/her place. You were the only one with the guts to do it. You hated to hurt feelings, but someone had to say out loud what everyone else was thinking. And now, it’s all over but the crying. It doesn’t matter who is the other person in this scenario, husband, wife, child, parent, brother, sister, church-member, co-worker, employee, boss. It’s now a mess. The emotional mess is all over the place. There is psychological blood running on the floor. And now you wish you hadn’t said it, but you just didn’t know what to do. Someone had to say something. The question is did they have to say what you did?
Let’s talk about that.
So, last Thursday night, our exchange daughter, Viktoria, came out of the bathroom. “Edwin, you need to see this!” The shower stall was filled with water backed up from a clogged drain, the sink was filling up as well, and the toilet was leaking water from underneath the base. Oh, great! Yep, you guessed it. Blocked up septic system. The septic guy came out Friday morning, cleaned it out, and said we should think about using different toilet paper. I got to thinking about how this mirrors a lot of troubled relationships.
Last week was New Year’s and many of us resolved to watch less tv, read more books. Whether or not that’s the case for you, if you only have one book that you have time to read this year…well, of course, make it the Bible. But if you have time to read two books this year, I’d like to make a recommendation: How to Have That Difficult Conversation You’ve Been Avoiding by Drs. Cloud and Townsend.
Check out the video review by clicking the link below.