Men! If you’re like me, you’ve been lied to. When told what to do to help overcome your lust, you have probably been given rotten advice that is not helping you, but hurting you. It is keeping you locked in cycles of lust and sexual frustration. Let me help you sweep the lie away so you can retrain your thinking and find greater and greater victory over lust.
I’d like to share a story with you. I warn you it is tragic and has no happy ending. But it is important. Sadly, I’ve seen this story play out again and again, though with different details. And admittedly, this is a compilation of multiple stories with some dramatic license taken on my part. Names have been changed to protect the innocent (and keep from shaming the guilty). You probably know these people or some like them.
Macklemore begins his song “Same Love” with this line: “When I was in third grade I thought that I was gay, ‘cause I could draw, my uncle was, and I kept my room straight.” Later in the song he offers his description of our culture saying, “A world so hateful some would rather die than be who they are.” This line hits on the fundamental problem of our day. And while many in our world are hateful, that is not the real problem highlighted by this lyric.
***WARNING: The trouble with writing on this topic is it needs to be done, but it is hard to do so in the confines of propriety. This post will be specific, factual, and even explicit. However, I will try not to be gratuitous or graphic. But if you normally let your kids read these posts, you may want to read it first. If you’re up for that, then click the “Continue Reading” link below.
Okay, so as usual I’m about three months behind on the pop-culture scene. My brother always gives me a hard time about this. However, just the other day I learned that Weird Al has a new song being released. It’s called “Perform This Way.” I heard a snippet and wanted to find out more about the original it is based on. After all, those songs are always funnier when you actually know who he’s lampooning. So I asked my daughter about Lady Gaga’s “Born This Way.” Then she sang some of the lyrics to me and I said, “Wait! What?” “Oh, Dad, it’s not about that.” “Really, what’s it about then?” “It’s just about her tough childhood and her mom telling her she’s born to be a superstar.” “Oh, okay,” I said, somewhat relieved. Then, last night on the way home from Bible class the song came on the radio. I was stunned to say the least. Tessa said I was missing the point. So we looked up the lyrics when we got home. The disappointment simply continued.
Okay, I admit it. I went for shock value in the original version of yesterday’s blog post title. You may be happy to know it didn’t produce the curiosity and traffic I had hoped. Maybe there’s hope for us yet. But some of the folks who came to the blog were thinking, “Oh, this would have been great to hear 20 years ago. But I didn’t do this. Now I’m married and things are a mess.” I get that. Why? Because I didn’t follow those 7 steps either. I blew it and I know how tough it is to overcome that. While it is harder to have a great sex life in marriage if you didn’t follow these 7 steps, your marriage can still be great and so can the sex. But how? What if I already blew the 7 steps, what do I do now?