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book reviews

“How To Have that Difficult Conversation You’ve Been Avoiding”

January 11, 2012 by Edwin Crozier Leave a Comment

Last week was New Year’s and many of us resolved to watch less tv, read more books. Whether or not that’s the case for you, if you only have one book that you have time to read this year…well, of course, make it the Bible. But if you have time to read two books this year, I’d like to make a recommendation: How to Have That Difficult Conversation You’ve Been Avoiding by Drs. Cloud and Townsend.

Check out the video review by clicking the link below.

[Read more…] about “How To Have that Difficult Conversation You’ve Been Avoiding”

Filed Under: book reviews, communication, God's Way for Our Congregations, God's Way for Our Family, God's Way for Our Lives, Growth, Husbands, Marriage, Raising Kids, Relationships, Wives Tagged With: Book Review, communication, confrontation, conversation, Henry Cloud, John Townsend, Marriage, Raising Kids, tough love, tough talks

Radical Challenges and Radical Mistakes: A Book Review

March 1, 2011 by Edwin Crozier 5 Comments

Please rank my review at Multnomah’s site by clicking here.

Radical: A Book Review

When a book has the word “radical” in the title, you can expect to be challenged. When a book is entitled Radical, you can expect to have your feet kicked out from under you. That is exactly what David Platt accomplishes with his book, Radical: Taking Back Your Faith from the American Dream. [Read more…] about Radical Challenges and Radical Mistakes: A Book Review

Filed Under: book reviews, Christian living, evangelism, God's Way for Our Congregations, God's Way for Our Lives Tagged With: blogging for books, book reviews, Christian book reviews, David Platt, Radical

Rite of Passage Parenting

October 12, 2010 by Edwin Crozier Leave a Comment

As is often the case after I spend a week with parents I think are doing a better job than me, I have loaded up on parental encouragement in the form of books. Thank you Half Price Bookstore. I’ve come across one that I think is going to revolutionize my thinking about my job as Dad and my expectations of my children.

The book is Rite of Passage Parenting: Four Essential Experiences to Equip Your Kids for Life* by Walker Moore. Our job as parents is to bring up our children in the discipline and instruction of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4). Bring them up, that is, lead them to maturity and adulthood. Moore suggests our American culture has lost four essentials to help bring our children up to that maturity.

  1. Rite of Passage
  2. Significant Tasks
  3. Logical Consequences
  4. Grace Deposits

I haven’t finished the book yet, but I’ve read enough to be excited about its promise and if the book falls flat in delivering good advice the mere concept has opened my eyes to a better way to work with my kids. Sometimes I think he is over the top with his satirical humor (perhaps the result of working as a youth minister–one can tend to forget that in writing a book for parents he no longer has to shoot from the hip with excessive humor). Additionally, some of his illustrations fall flat for me because of the difference in perspective on things like prom. However, I’m getting a great deal out of this book and I look forward to telling you all about it when I’m finished.

Today, I thought I would simply throw out the concept and leave you with a passage from the book to whet your appetite.

Walton’s Mountain Revisited

While I was growing up, my parents used to make us sit through (back then, it seemed more like “suffer through”) a television show called The Waltons. Each week the show reached us throug the vision and voice of John-Boy, the eldest son of John and Olivia Walton. John-Boy worked with his dad on a farm in the Blue Ridge Mountains and helped him run the sawmill.

Today, this show might be considered politically incorrect. For instance, John and Olivia actually expected John-Boy to work–planting corn, feeding livestock, and chopping wood. He and his six siblings had to do their chores in order for the family to survive. You would never hear his dad say, “You know what? We ought to let our kids be kids. They’ll grow up soon enough.”

If The Waltons had been written about our modern-day family, the show would look very different. First of all, no one would expect John-Boy to help his family. While his dad tried to keep the farm going, John-Boy would sit in his room, playing video games. His sole responsibilities would consist of making his bed and taking out the trash. He could only accomplish these tasks, of course, with tremendous whining, complaining, and snorting like a bull poised for attack.

If the contemporary John and Olivia ever dared to let John-Boy go outside, he would certainly have to be covered from head to toe in protective gear. Can you see our modern-day John-Boy coming out to chop wood? He would have a helmet–not just any old helmet, but one that had passed all the government safety ratings. He would don protective eyewear, elbow pads, and safety shoes with reinforced steel toes. His parents would make sure he had a rope tying the axe handle to his wrist. That way, if he let the ax slip, it wouldn’t go very far. It would have a safety shield covering its head so John-Boy wouldn’t accidentally cut himself. Of course, it would also come with a safety DVD so he could learn which end was sharp and how he should always keep it point away from his face. Finally, the ax would come shrink-wrapped in clear plastic–the kind that even a nuclear blast can’t break free.

I’m sure you get the idea of where this is going. I can’t wait to learn more about helping my children become adults. I’ll share with you what I learn as we’re going along.

*This post does contain affiliate links. Hey, I’m trying to help you with your parenting. Why don’t you help me with mine, click the link, buy a book, help my kids. Here’s another chance.

Filed Under: book reviews, Daughters, Disciplining Children, Family Time, Fathers, God's Way for Our Family, Mother, parenting, Raising Kids Tagged With: books, help for parents, parenting, raising children, Rite of Passage, Walker Moore

“The Dumbest Generation” by Mark Bauerlein (A Review by Shane Scott)

March 31, 2009 by Edwin Crozier Leave a Comment

Glad you could make it to today’s Springboard for Your Family Life. I have a special treat “presidential candidate” Shane Scott, who runs the Faith and Thought blog, has put on his serious cap for this guest post and provided us a great review of Mark Bauerlein’s book The Dumbest Generation: How the Digital Age Stupefies Young Americans and Jeopardizes Our Future (Or, Don’t Trust Anyone Under 30). Thanks Shane for this excellent review.

“The Dumbest Generation”

The basic thesis of The Dumbest Generationis spelled out in its subtitle: “How the Digital Age Stupefies Young Americans and Jeopardizes Our Future (Or, Don’t Trust Anyone Under 30).” Mark Bauerlein’s argument is that the under-30 generation (sometimes called the “Millennials”) have more information and technology at their fingertips than any other generation in history, but ironically this digital revolution has contracted rather than expanded their knowledge. 

Why is this the case? Part of it according to Bauerlein is the intrinsic nature of digital media. The under-30s rarely read books (Bauerlein calls them “bibliophobes”). Instead, they prefer the computer screen. While in theory lots of reading could be done on the web, the fact is that the inherent design of web pages discourages deep and thoughtful reading. As Nielsen Norman (an expert in web page development) said in response to a question on how web users read, “They don’t” (p. 143). 

As a result, the under-30 generation lags behind other nations in intellectual development. Almost a quarter of them need remedial reading and writing classes once they reach college, and even the National Association of Manufacturers complains that one of its major problems is finding workers with adequate reading comprehension skills (p. 63). Under-30 kids rank poorly in comparison to kids in other industrial countries in math (although they rank far ahead in how good they think they are!), indicating that we are setting this generation up for demoralizing failure-convincing them they are much better prepared for college and work than they really are (pp. 192-195). 

Another major factor in the stunted intellectual development of the millennials is the “peer absorption” texting, instant messaging, and social networking foster (p. 133). Previous generations of kids were just as concerned about their peers, but once they got home from school, they were no longer immersed in the world of their peers, aside from talking on a landline. But the under-30s can remain in constant contact with peers by virtue of texting, cell phones, instant messaging, and the web. Thus a millennial can remain in a cocoon of teenage culture. 

As a result, under-30 kids are deprived of a vital component of the transition from adolescence to adulthood – the vertical modeling of older, more mature mentors like parents, teachers, employers, ministers, and so on (pp. 136). This vertical modeling enables teens to see what the real world is like, and reinforces how trivial so many of the concerns of their own peer group is contrast to the authentic issues of life. Even worse, the digital technology allows teens to construct a “reflexive surrounding” of blogs, games, videos, music, messages that “mirror their woes and fantasies” rather than challenging them to move beyond the limited horizon of their friends to experience adult realities (pp. 137-138). 

Bauerlein’s concerns are for the future of American democracy. How can we survive without a well-informed electorate that can reason and debate the great issues? But as I read this book I could not help but fear for the future of God’s people in our culture. After all, the Bible is a book–and if the millennials are uninterested in books and therefore becoming incapable of the deep and reflective focus needed to understand the Scriptures. 

Here is what I often see. I see families who use DVD players to babysit their kids or to pacify them in trips in the van, completely missing out on the opportunity for cross-generational interaction. I remember road trips when I was a little boy (partly because I often got carsick!), but mainly because I remember how much fun it was to listen to Mom and Granny and Pop (and later, to argue with them about things like politics!). Once kids outgrow watching DVDs they have iPods and handheld video games to occupy them, and when they are older cellphones with unlimited texting. For some kids, even the short 20 minute drive to church is impossible to survive without being plugged into the lives of their peers at every moment. 

So is it any wonder that we have a generation of kids that knows each other’s list of “25 unusual facts about me,” but does not know the most basic facts about Jesus. Kids who are lagging in spiritual maturity because it is rare for an older mentor to penetrate the bubble of peer consciousness and help them grow wiser than their years. And kids who are so used to creating a digital environment tailored to their likes and interests that they resist doing anything they don’t find fun or interesting. 

The other day I was talking with one of my friends who is around 30, and I made the comment that the push for gay marriage is a clear example of the generation gap. My point was that people my age and older listen to the arguments for gay marriage, and our response is very simple – if no culture in human history (included the cultures that openly tolerated homosexuality) ever thought it was a good idea to define marriage as between a man and man or woman and woman, why should we suddenly redefine marriage now? But the problem is that a generation submerged in itself is “disassociated from tradition, with nobody telling them that sometimes they must mute the voices inside them and heed instead the voices of distant greatness” (p. 190). 

This review probably makes me sound like an old fogey! But my thoughts – like this book – are prompted by nothing but love and concern for my friends under 30. This is not an issue of innate intelligence (in fact, the IQ scores of kids continue to rise). It is the frustration at seeing so much potential for good squandered. And so, I urge all of you who are above 30 to embrace the role of curmudgeon, to challenge, prod, provoke the kids you have contact with. If you are a parent, restrict their access to the digital wasteland. And to whatever extent you have influence, help them be ready for the day to come when it is time to “put away childish things.”

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Family Life, book reviews, parenting Tagged With: Book Review, Mark Bauerlein, Shane Scott, The Dumbest Generation

“Do Hard Things”

December 29, 2008 by Edwin Crozier 8 Comments

Do Hard Things. That’s what Alex and Brett Harris encourage in their recent book of the same title. This would be impressive enough if it were written to adults by adults. Instead, it is written to teens by teens. The Harris brothers are 19 year-old twins. At age 16, they interned at the Alabama Supreme Court. At seventeen, they served as grass-roots directors for four statewide political campaigns. By 18, they were the co-authors of the web’s most popular Christian teen blog. This year, they have co-authored a book that is destined to be a bestseller, if it hasn’t already reached that status.

If you are a teenager or plan to be someday, if you have children or grandchildren who are teenagers or plan to be someday, if you know a teenager, if you used to be a teenager, this book is for you. One warning to the post-teenagers: if you wasted your teen years, this book will produce a bit of shame and guilt. However, for me, it did it in a positive way that hasn’t made me linger in shame but rather encouraged me to get moving right now.

The Harris brothers challenge today’s teens to rebel against our culture’s low expectations. They take a decidedly Christian approach, but their book is helpful even if you are not a Christian. Their challenge is simple—Do Hard Things. Don’t take the easy path. Don’t take the path of least resistance. Don’t be satisfied with mediocrity from yourself even if everyone else thinks your mediocrity is excellent.

On the down side, I do think they missed the boat on what the Scriptures say regarding salvation. They tout the common evangelical line that salvation is by faith alone, despite the fact that the only place in the Bible the phrase “faith alone” is used is a passage saying justification does not come by faith alone (James 2:24). They totally ignore the role of baptism in becoming God’s child (cf. Mark 16:16; Acts 2:38; I Peter 3:21). Also, while I recognize we can serve God no matter what our profession, I think they confuse this with actual missionary work. I think it is great that teenagers have become involved in the ending of modern day slavery, in providing houses for the needy and food for the homeless. Those works, as good as they are, however, are not fulfilling the great commission. The great commission is to teach the gospel to the lost and baptize them in the name of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit (cf. Matthew 28:18-20).

Despite those problems, I think this book is a must read. I have no doubt my congregation will be getting some lessons this year inspired by the challenges I read in Do Hard Things. While much of what they said applies to secular profession or social concerns, the principles highly apply to spiritual lives, as the Harris brothers repeatedly point out. Jesus called His people to avoid the broad, wide, easy road and walk on the narrow, strait and difficult road. Jesus has called us to do hard things.

The cream of the book is the discussion of the “Five Kinds of Hard.” 1) Doing things outside your comfort zone. 2) Doing things that go beyond what is expected or required. 3) Doing things too big to accomplish alone. 4) Doing things that don’t earn immediate payoff. 5) Doing things that go against the grain of the cultural norms. I especially liked #4 because it reminded me some hard things are very small. However, facing up to those small hard challenges repeatedly produces big, long-term results.

My wife picked up this book Saturday afternoon. While she was busy, I read the first chapter and then absconded with it. I finished it on Sunday evening. I guess the first hard thing I need to do is apologize to my wife for stealing. However, I’m really excited to hit 2009 with this great encouragement to Do Hard Things. I encourage you, even if it is hard, get this book. Read it. Read it to your kids. I think you’ll be changed by it. It’s definitely a springboard for your spiritual life.

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Spiritual Life, book reviews, parenting, Raising Kids, Teen Issues Tagged With: Alex Harris, book reviews, Brett Harris, Do Hard Things, rebellion, teen years, teenagers

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