• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

God's Way Works

For a better life and a better eternity

Edwin Crozier

The 2 Greatest Lessons I’ve Ever Learned

December 8, 2008 by Edwin Crozier 2 Comments

I’ve learned all kinds of lessons throughout my life. Some from other people, some from experience and investigation, some from Scripture. But I have boiled down all these to the two greatest lessons I’ve learned from life.

Lesson #1:

There is a God: I can’t help but look around at the world from the expansive universe and its elements of design to the microscopic human cell and its amazing wonders.

Lesson #2:

I’m not Him: Well, duh.

The point is that every day I’m learning that when I try to go my own way and run my life the way I want, I mess it up. If I would just do what God asks of me, I know His way works. It may not work on my timetable. But it works. If I work it His way, He’ll grant me freedom, peace, happiness. He’ll make my marriage work. He’ll make my family work. He’ll provide for me materially, spiritually, emotionally.

So, why on earth would I pick up the reins and try to run things today. Let me just surrender to Him. His way works.

Have you learned these lessons?

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Spiritual Life, relying on God, surrender Tagged With: faith, God, I'm not God, surrender to God, trust

7 Keys to Learning What is On Your Child’s Heart

December 2, 2008 by Edwin Crozier 2 Comments

I once heard a story about a Bible class. The teacher asked, “Jimmy, what is furry, has a bushy tail, collects nuts and lives in trees?” Jimmy thought to himself, “Well, that sounds like a squirrel, but this is Bible class…” Out loud he replied, “Jesus.”

How often do people, especially children, not share what they really think, but rather give us the answer they think we want to hear. This happened to me on Sunday. You may have read yesterday’s post about foul language. On the way home from preaching that lesson, I asked Tessa (my 11 year old daughter) if she had any questions.

“Nope.”

I pushed a little more, “Do you have any questions about any of the words I suggested were bad?”

“No, why would I have questions?”

That tipped me off. “Hmmm, I thought. Are there really no questions or is she wanting me to believe she just has no questions because she wants me to think she always agrees with me or is afraid I’ll think badly of her.”

I pushed a little harder, “Well, I just know in the past you’ve had questions about certain words and I was hoping this lesson might have helped you think about them. Are you saying you don’t have any questions because you don’t or because you think that’s what I want to hear?”

“Well, I was wondering about…”

Then a great conversation followed about what kind of language we could use. We talked about some words she just shouldn’t ever say based on clear principles from the Bible, some words she isn’t allowed to say while living under my roof because even though I can’t absolutely prove they violate a principle I feel pretty strongly that they do, some words that we need to be careful about around others because we know they have conscience about them and some words I said I would leave up to her to say even now.

No, we didn’t solve any world problems but we did have a great conversation and I think I really helped her think about her language. I certainly helped her think about it way more than had I just said, “Don’t say this, it’s bad,” and then shut down any questions she had about it. Further, I think she is much more likely to live within the bounds of our family rules having heard my honest reasons for them–even if she disagrees with them.

I get some great pointers about parenting from this:

  1. Don’t just accept it when your kids go along with you. Push and make sure that is really what they are feeling and thinking.
  2. Ask your kids questions to help see what is really on their heart.
  3. Let your kids know you still love them even if they disagree with you.
  4. Be honest. Too many parents bluster and bluff when they make a point but don’t really have any solid footing for their opinion. Kids can see through this (or will when they think logically). When they do, they won’t just discount this one issue, but most of what you ever said.
  5. Let your kids ask questions and then answer them. Certainly, there is a time for “Because I said so,” but if you want to make a lasting impression on them, carry on the honest dialogue.
  6. Don’t feel like the conversation has to end with your child agreeing with you. Sure, there is a place for the child to behave in line with your opinion even if they disagree with it. However, I do not have to verbally beat my child into agreeing with me to have a positive successful conversation.
  7. Let your child know you appreciate him/her being honest with you. This will encourage more of the same in the future.
Too many parents walk blissfully through life thinking their kids are on the same page with them because the parent never prods deeper than the surface veneer of just trying to please. They never actually see their children’s hearts because they never work at looking past their outsides. I don’t mean to suggest every kid is hiding some deep, dark secret on the inside. I’m just pointing out that if you want to know your kids there are some great guidelines for good conversations, but you have to work at it.

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Family Life, Daughters, Raising Kids Tagged With: children, conversations with kids, foul language, raising children, talking to your kids

What Does the Bible Say about Foul Language?

December 1, 2008 by Edwin Crozier 1 Comment

I don’t like to do this very often. However, as a Springboard for Your Spiritual Life, I would like to share with you the sermon I presented to the Franklin Church in Franklin, Tennessee yesterday. The topic was submitted to me as a question. 

You can find the sermon in its original formatting and also hear the audio at this link on the congregation’s website.

***WARNING: I will warn you that in this lesson, I felt it necessary by way of illustration to state some of the words and phrases that are considered profanity. If that makes you uncomfortable, you may wish to listen to someone else’s lesson on this subject instead.

What Does the Bible Say about Foul Language?

Introduction:

With the change of our assembly schedule, we have been missing our 2nd Sunday Questions and Answers sermon. The elders have decided for now to make our 5th Sunday assemblies our new schedule for the Q & A lessons. Today’s question is “What does the Bible say about foul language?” I am going to make a confession as we begin. I have some fear about this lesson. First, because it is hard to speak on this subject clearly without crossing the very bounds of propriety I’m trying to preserve. Second, since what I will say is not going to coincide with the traditional lessons on this topic, I fear some of you will be upset with me. However, I am 100% convinced what I am going to tell you is the truth. As I have always said, I don’t believe I have all the answers but I do believe the Bible does. If, when I am done, you think I have missed the boat on something, I would be happy to learn from you what you believe the Bible teaches.

 

Discussion:

I.      What the Bible doesn’t say.

A.    In the 1980s, George Carlin became famous for his very vulgar skit about the 8 words not allowed on television. I wish this lesson were that simple. I wish I could turn you to a passage that gave us the list of bad words. But I can’t. There just isn’t one.

B.    We have often heard preachers go to Matthew 26:74 where it says Peter began to curse and swear to speak against bad words today. However, in the first place, this text is not talking about cussing in the sense of bad words as we usually mean it. Rather, it means he either cursed the people he was talking to or himself. That is, not that he used “curse words,” but that he uttered curses against them. And then he swore, that is, he called on the name of God to take an oath that he was not one of the apostles. But even if this was a passage that referred to bad words, it doesn’t tell us what they would be.

C.    The fact is, there is not one single verse that provides us any teaching that declares that any particular word is inherently bad. In fact strictly speaking, there is no biblical concept of bad words. Don’t misunderstand, the Bible does speak of corrupt speech, what we might call using words badly. However, there is no decree from God that lists even one single word as bad simply because the word is bad. We need to be honest, when we tell someone a certain word is bad, we are not doing so because God has defined that word as bad. We are doing so either because we have decided that word in our culture violates some principles of God’s word or because our society and culture has determined the word is bad.

II.     What the Bible does say.

A.    While the Bible does not give us a list of words to avoid, it does provide some principles to guide our speech. I will share those principles with you and let you be the judge of what words you should and should not say.

B.    Principle #1: No corrupting talk (Ephesians 4:29)—Instead of words that tear down, we are supposed to use words that build up. The building up here does not refer solely to spiritual edification. This doesn’t provide a list of words to remove from our speech. But it does point out that belittling speech, shaming speech, berating speech, name-calling and other forms of speech that tear people down rather than build them up is foul in the Christian’s mouth.

C.    Principle #2: No careless words (Matthew 12:36-37)—This statement is somewhat difficult to nail down. But the word here means idle or lazy. I think the ESV gets the heart of its meaning when it says “careless.” That is, no matter what we say if we are speaking lazily, that is without careful consideration and thought, we will be judged for it. We could say “thoughtless speech.” Have you ever been in an argument and had to back up and say, “I didn’t mean that, it just came out.” That is speaking without thinking, without care. Jesus tells us not to do it.

D.    Principle #3: No irreverent or profane words (I Timothy 4:7; 6:20; II Timothy 2:16)—Where the ESV says “irreverent,” other translations say “profane.” In our day “profanity” has come to encompass all “bad words.” But profanity in the Biblical sense actually means to treat the holy in a low, base, light and irreverent manner. This includes taking the Lord’s name in vain. But it goes beyond that. Should we speak of the holy heaven in such a light manner as those do when they say, “For heaven’s sake” or “My heavens”? We should not treat lightly the holy teachings of Christ as some do when they joke about the Lord’s words.

E.    Principle #4: No cursing (Romans 12:14; James 3:9-10)—This is not about “cussing,” but rather calling curses down upon men. No doubt, we are allowed to warn of God’s curses on men, but it is not our job to curse men. When we say things like “damn you” or “go to hell” we are cursing men. That shouldn’t come from our mouths. However, this is not merely limited to those magic words that have been deemed curse words by our society. If we cursed a man saying “a pox upon you” as was popular in past centuries, we would be violating this principle.

F.    Principle #5: No filthy, foolish or crude speaking (Ephesians 5:4)—For the longest time, I tried to figure out the difference in the three terms used here. However, in the context of Ephesians 5:3, 5, 11-12, I am convinced Paul is not telling us about three different bad forms of speech but rather emphasizing one point by using parallelism. He is talking about the light and crude discussion of sinful activities, especially of sexual immorality. This is not simply talking about some words for sex our society deems base and vulgar. It also cautions us against speaking of immorality as if it is a joke or joking about it. It forbids what we would call dirty jokes as well.

G.   Principle #6: No malicious words (Ephesians 4:31)—We must not speak words that intend to harm either to someone’s face or behind their back. Let me make a point here. In our society, we are told the word for female dog is bad. And when using it as a derogatory attack on someone, it most definitely is. But for some reason, the word for female horse or female cow is okay. But is calling someone a nag or heifer any less malicious than the word we have declared bad?

H.    Principle #7: Speak honorably in the sight of men (II Corinthians 8:20-21)—This point is somewhat different than the others, but no less important. The passage we are reading is not talking about speech. It is talking about the use of money. However, please note the important principle that we want to do what is honorable not merely before God, but also before men. We do not want to leave ourselves open to accusations from men. We are not allowed to merely say that what others think is unimportant. If our society has declared that a word or phrase is bad, we should not use it because we leave ourselves open to an accusation from men. Rather, we need to speak in a way that will be deemed honorable among men.

III.   A few comments about euphemisms.

A.    According to Webster’s Encyclopedic Unabridged Dictionary of the English Language, a euphemism is “the substitution of a mild, indirect, or vague expression for one thought to be offensively harsh or blunt.” Since I became a Christian, I have heard numerous things about euphemisms ranging from “Christians should never, ever use euphemisms because that is just as bad as really cussing” to “what’s the big deal about euphemisms, Christians don’t have to worry about those at all.” I think both extremes are mistaken. I will make three comments about euphemisms and, as before, allow you to make the applications you deem fit.

B.    We cannot make blanket statements against euphemisms. Sadly, the statements that sweep with too broad a brush, discarding “euphemisms” as wholly sinful simply demonstrate ignorance about what a euphemism is. The fact is the Bible uses euphemisms. For instance, in I Samuel 24:3 when the ESV says Saul went in to relieve himself and the KJV says “cover his feet,” the Bible used a euphemistic phrase to avoid saying that Saul was defecating. Further, even those who have made such blanket rebukes of “euphemisms” use them and would laud their use at times. Have you ever heard someone say, “he used a four-letter-word”? “Four-letter-word” is a euphemism so the person relating the story can avoid actually saying the word and we with sensitive ears appreciate that euphemism. Finally, if we are going to make a blanket statement against any and all words described as euphemisms, we are going to be in some real trouble. According to The Online Etymology Dictionary (etymonline.com) the words “assemble” and “fellowship” were viewed for several centuries as euphemisms for sexual intercourse.

C.    However, you need to consider your intent. While we cannot make the blanket statement that anything considered a euphemism is wrong, we shouldn’t take the opposite approach of saying God never said euphemisms were wrong so we don’t have to worry about them. Because of our magic “bad word” mentality, we sometimes think if we chose a word society doesn’t think is bad we are okay. But, we need to remember God is not as concerned with the actual words as what is intended by those words. For instance, I think each and every one of us would say I was violating the principle of “no cursing” found in Romans 12:14 and James 3:9-10 if I said “God damn you” to someone. But, brothers and sisters, if instead I looked at that person and said, “Gosh darn you,” was my intent any less to curse them just because I didn’t use the words our society has defined as bad? Yes, we do need to take care. Using a euphemistic phrase does not change the intent of our heart and the motivation of our speech. If our motivation violates one of the principles, the words may not be considered bad, but the speech is corrupt.

D.    You need to consider the insinuation. Euphemisms are a kind of insinuation. That is, instead of directly saying something, we are indirectly saying something. For instance, when we say someone “passed away” we are using a euphemism that means they died. We are insinuating their death. When we use euphemisms that indirectly mean or sound like “bad words” we are often insinuating those words and if nothing else leading others to think those words. If you say, “Oh my gosh” what do you think you insinuated in the minds of those who heard you? The same could be asked about words like “dang,” “heck,” “geez,” and others. As Christians, we do need to give careful consideration to the words we use because of the insinuations we make in the minds of those who hear. I know that doesn’t give us a list of bad euphemisms, but it gives us a principle I believe we need to consider as we choose our words carefully.

Conclusion:

Again, I wish this could have been as simple as here are the eight magic words you just aren’t allowed to use. But God didn’t give that to us. Rather, He gave us principles and we had better take care to consider them as we choose our words, phrases, jokes and other speech. We will be judged for every thoughtless, careless idle word we speak (Matthew 12:36-37), so we had better think before we speak. I hope this was helpful. As I said, I know it does not coincide with everything you have probably ever heard in the traditional lesson on these topics. If you believe I missed something or did not represent accurately how the Bible answers this question, I hope you will share that with me. May God bless us as we strive to surrender our speech to Him.

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Spiritual Life, Christian living, Speech Tagged With: cursing, cussing, George Carlin, swearing, The Christian and foul language, the words you can't say on television

Edwin in Real Life: Look at Self before Giving Advice

November 25, 2008 by Edwin Crozier 4 Comments

Some friends were over last night and we watched Dan in Real Life for what must have been the 10th time for Marita and me. I just love that movie. 

Granted, I have to say I don’t buy the Hollywood message that we really can know true love in just three days. I think Dan was right the first time when he said that was infatuation and not real love. On the other hand, real love can grow out of that infatuation if they work hard for the years to come.

However, what I really wanted to highlight in today’s Springboard for Your Family is how easy it is to give good advice and not really pay attention to it yourself.

Steve Carell plays Dan Burns, a widowed parenting advice columnist with three daughters. While at a yearly extended family weekend, he meets a woman at a bookstore and feels an immediate connection. When he gets back to the family house, he discovers this woman is actually his brother’s girlfriend. Then the fun really begins.

It’s a romantic comedy of errors as Dan tries to shut off his feelings for Marie and in the process breaks nearly every bit of advice he would offer parents with his own girls. I see me in Dan. Don’t get me wrong, I never wanted to date my brothers’ girlfriend (especially since my brothers are more than a decade younger than I am). But I do, sadly, often break the very advice I would offer others about how to relate to my wife and children.

Hey, this is about progress not perfection. But, at the same time, before we spend all our time telling everyone else how they should parent, taking their inventory about their relationships, we need to take our own inventory. In fact, before we tell our spouse how to live and behave to fix our marriage, we should look at how we are behaving. Before we tell our kids or parents how to behave, we should look at how we are behaving.

In the end, Dan finally gets the girl, makes amends with his daughters and gets the girl. His brother finds someone else and all is well for Dan in Real Life. Granted, real life doesn’t always work out so handsomely. But it will always come out better if we look at how we are behaving first.

 

Just for fun, here’s the trailer:

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Family Life, Marriage, parenting, Raising Kids, Videos Tagged With: Dan in Real life, family, look at self first, Marriage, Raising Kids, Steve Carell, video

Boosting Your Courage to Spread the Gospel

November 24, 2008 by Edwin Crozier 2 Comments

I’m happy to share with you this guest column by Terry Francis, minister for the East Shelby Church of Christ in Collierville, Tennessee.

The Courage to Ask Her Out

I was never good at the game. I was the funny outgoing band geek that always played the role of “big brother” to the good looking girls. So while I was entertaining everyone, my friends were getting to know girls, collecting phone numbers, asking girls out, and dating. It wasn’t until I was a senior in High School that I finally mustered up the nerve to try to date. My mom would have liked it if I had waited longer I’m sure.

 Looking back it’s funny to think about my friends who were playing the game. It was almost a competition to see how many girls they could talk to. It is still common for a group of guys to see who can get the most phone numbers I am told. It’s amazing how bold and confident people can be sometimes.

Another Kind of Courage

There have been times since I have been married that I had the same anxieties I experienced earlier in my pre-dating life. A waiter at a restaurant seems nice and interesting. I know I want to ask them something, but I hesitate. It’s not what you think. My wife is with me in those moments but she’s not what keeps me quiet. It’s my fear of rejection.

You see, there are times I meet a nice hard-working person in every day life and I think to myself, “I wonder if they are in a relationship with God. I wonder if they are saved.” Because of my fear—that same fear I had as a teenager—I sit back and say nothing. I drive away thinking, “I missed a great opportunity there! I should have said something.”

Sharing the gospel of Jesus Christ is far more important than dating. I wonder how effective we might be if we approached evangelism with the same gusto we did when we dove into the dating world. What if we collected phone numbers for Jesus? What if we tried to see how many personal studies we could set up?

Paul wrote, “For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek” (Romans 1:16). I need to realize the gospel is a better product than I ever was! My fears as a teenager in relation to girls were always “Am I good enough?” or “She’ll think I’m too fat” or “I’m too ugly for her.” My fears of rejection were based in a lack of confidence in me as a product. In short, I was ashamed of who I was. The gospel of Christ is perfect. There is no need to be ashamed. It is flawless. It fits everyone. I can go out and speak to everyone about the gospel with complete confidence.

 

The Springboard for Your Spiritual Life

I know what the problem is. It’s not that we think the gospel is inadequate. The problem goes back to me: “What if I say the wrong thing? What if I mess up? If they don’t agree to study with me, then I messed up.” Our job is to sow the seed (gospel) whether it grows and blooms into a mature plant or not. In the parable of the soils, three of the four types of ground did not accept the seed (Matthew 13:3–23). That means there will be more failures than successes. But that shouldn’t stop us. Our job is to sow the seed.

I must resolve that I have nothing to fear. Paul told Timothy God didn’t give us a timid spirit (2 Timothy 1:7). I must commit to exercising my power and love given to me by God to teach the gospel to all men.

May God help us all to speak up and teach the gospel of Jesus Christ. 

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Spiritual Life, evangelism Tagged With: Collierville, dating, East Shelby church of Christ, evangelism, Terry Francis

Families Need to Listen

November 18, 2008 by Edwin Crozier 2 Comments

I’m happy to offer you this guest article by Frederic Gray, leader of the Fathers of Faith, Daughters of Excellence Retreat.

 

Families Need to Listen

Have you ever had an event take place in your life and you knew you would never be the same?  You knew because of some statement you heard, book you read or occurrence that took place you would never be the same. It has to me…several times.  But I don’t think any of those moments have had quite the same impact on me as the one I will share with you now.

One day, my tenth grade health teacher, Mr. MacFarland, a former Mr. Minnesota, had us answer a series of questions on a sheet of paper.  We did this exercise as individuals, quietly, but then we had to answer the questions out loud in front of the whole class. We went down each row in numerical order.  When it came time for the question, “I am good at ________,” the girl whose turn it was said, “I am a good listener.” 

Mr. MacFarland stopped the class.  He said, “Everyone listen to what she said. If you are a good listener, you will never run out of friends.”

WHAT???  Could he be right??? 

You see, up until that time in my life, I was often very lonely, and had trouble making friends.  I was socially awkward more often than not, and I desperately craved the friends everyone else seemed to have.

I HAD to test his theory.  So I called a girl that I used to live next door to.  After we got beyond, “So why did you call?” and, “Oh, I just called to say hi,” I had nothing to say.  So I said the only thing I could think of.  “So, um…are there any guys you like?”  Boy, did I hit the magic button!  She talked, and talked, and talked, and talked…you get the idea.

Two hours later, with me having said a handful of “huhs” and “wows,” she said, “This was fun. Call me tomorrow.”

From that moment on, my life has never been the same.  My life changed instantly! From that day, my friends have continued to multiply exponentially.  Girls instantly took an interest in me.  Adults thought I was respectful. And children loved me. And all of this happened because I listened.

You can imagine my surprise when, after I became a Christian at age 21, I discovered that God actually commands people to be slow to speak and quick to listen. (James 1:19)

So what is the point of all of this?

Well, based on my personal observations and feedback from others, it seems to me the family is a place listening is often neglected.  In the family, people often forsake proactive listening and focus on themselves. 

Listening is powerful, almost magical.  Listening proactively, especially within a family context where we have so many needs, can sooth someone’s anxiety, communicate love, serve as emotional affection, and serves as a calming salve for arguments (Proverbs 15:1).

In addition, when you begin to understand someone through proactive listening, it is much easier to give them the benefit of the doubt.  Aren’t we a lot more forgiving when we understand where someone is coming from?  Let’s take a look at each of our family members, and let’s be slow to speak, and quick to listen.  Let’s change our families for the better by making our home a haven of understanding, rather than a web of mangled assumptions.

—Frederic Gray

Filed Under: A Springboard for Your Family Life, Frederic Gray, Relationships Tagged With: family, James 1:19, listening, respect

  • « Go to Previous Page
  • Go to page 1
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Go to page 47
  • Go to page 48
  • Go to page 49
  • Go to page 50
  • Go to page 51
  • Interim pages omitted …
  • Go to page 53
  • Go to Next Page »

Primary Sidebar

Search

Categories

Get God’s Way in Your Inbox

Enter your email address:

Delivered by FeedBurner

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries RSS
  • Comments RSS
  • WordPress.org

Copyright © 2025 · Genesis Sample on Genesis Framework · WordPress · Log in